Lonely Thanksgiving

So it's pretty amazing what can happen in a couple of weeks; imagine so, that I'm going through a lot of life changes recently. I've been trying out new things and have started things that I probably wouldn't have ever done so before; things that I really can't say in a public blog... it's really not as bad as you guys are thinking though.

Anyways, I've been meeting both new and old friends and have started hanging around them more; I guess that's where several rumors come from. But as one of my friends said to me, "Those are just rumors, let rumors be rumors." They don't really matter as long as I'm having a good time.

So I was watching this movie the other day, one that I've never heard of but decided to watch it because the timing was right since I was waiting for one of my friends to get off work. I watched it alone, it was called, "Four Christmases." Actually I didn't finish it since I left early but I got a lot out of it. Of course, it's supposed to be a romantic comedy so it's not necessarily supposed to make you sad; but when I watched it I started to get sad. I don't really want to get into too much detail; let's just say that I felt that I could really relate to everything that was happenin in a strange sense... I also don't want to spoil it for anybody that plans on watching it.

I've also discovered something else, I've discovered an "ugly truth." I promise you, if I could write everything that I want to say or that I'm thinking then probably this entry could be a lot more interesting. Let's just say that I've finally heard from somebody else the truth that I've always thought to myself. And now I know that other people feel the same way, it's sort of sad for me. Once again, there are things that shouldn't be said. Well, on this subject matter, it's great to know that somebody else is handling an old problem of mine; that makes me EXTREMELY happy. Once again, I don't have the liberty of going into detail.

So it's Thanksgiving; this weekend is sort of bad for me. In fact, this week in general hasn't been the best week, but I'm making the most of it to keep myself happy. I'm working this entire weekend while my family is in Vegas. I just spent like half an hour at an extended family's house that I've never met before. Extremely awkward, I felt that I just came, ate their food, and left. My family is in Vegas and I couldn't go because of work. So I pretty much had the loneliest Thanksgiving ever. At least I had good food, otherwise I just would have heated up some TV dinner and called it a night. I have work tomorrow at 3AM, so let's just see how that goes.

A small entry to you guys; but if you actually knew everything that was going on in my life, then you'd understand that I've just spilled a million secrets.

Cusp Baby

So astrology is pretty interesting. I never really thought about looking in this deep with my sign; but for some reason four of my friends this week told me a lot about astrology and the zodiac. They sort of compelled me to go to astrology.com and look up my sign.

Apparently I'm born on a cusp; which means I share different characteristics of two signs; usually people are more of one sign when they're cusps but I was born right in the middle. I'm a Virgo/Libra cusp and this is what astrology.com had to say about my sign(s):

Virgo is the sixth sign of the zodiac; Libra is the seventh. Virgo/Libras strive to create balance and harmony between themselves and others. They bring their skills and talents together for the good of others. Despite their inherent modesty, those born on the Virgo/Libra cusp are industrious and efficient when working for a good cause. Objective and just, Virgo/Libras are excellent arbitrators and enjoy lots of friends.

The astrological symbol of Virgo is the Virgin; Libra is represented by the Scales. Virgo/Libras abhor unfairness and conflict, striving above all for peace, but at times they are easily deterred from their beliefs. They are able to see all sides of an argument, but as their mental scales sway back and forth, they may never find balance and can become fickle and indecisive. They are skilled at seeing all sides of a situation, which is an expression of Virgo's mutable quality. Virgo/Libras are skilled at initiating group projects. In this way, the cardinal quality of Libra is exemplified. When Virgo/Libras set goals for themselves, they are determined to succeed. This astrological combination tends to be about other people rather than personal development. They are socially inclined and charming, but their focus is about smaller-scale projects and individuals. Because of Virgo's association with individuals and health, and Libra's innate interest in others, many Virgo/Libras are drawn toward careers in medicine.

Virgo is ruled by the planet Mercury. In ancient Roman mythology, Mercury (and his Greek equivalent, Hermes) was the messenger god. He was a quick, nervous type, and he was known for his strong reasoning and ability to analyze. Communication is his province. As a planet, Mercury is androgynous. Libra is ruled by the planet Venus. In ancient Roman mythology, Venus (and her Greek equivalent, Aphrodite) was the goddess of love, beauty and pleasure. She represented joy, happiness and appreciation of beautiful things and people. Libra is the masculine, or day, aspect of Venus; Taurus is the feminine, or night aspect.

Virgo/Librans are happiest when they're in a relationship. They are seductive and attractive, and their cultural awareness and talkative nature help them shine in the social situations they so enjoy. They tend to explore subjects deeply and are very good at understanding the deeper meaning of what others say. Many Virgo/Libras have an excellent head for business, relying on logic rather than ego or emotion to make their deals. They are reliable, practical, diligent, controlled and rational.

The element associated with Virgo is Earth. The element associated with Libra is Air. Virgo/Libras tend to respond to the world with intellect and by examining the worth of each possible response. Their intellectual orientation to the world around them makes them skilled at communication and abstract reasoning, and their intelligence combines with their interest in others to become an intellectual exploration of the people around them.

Because of their responsibility and attention to detail, those born on the Virgo/Libra cusp tend to be perfectionists. They may worry about small details, but this is often necessary when attempting to be as fair and diplomatic as possible. They are team workers, skilled at cooperative action, but they can also be self-doubting. Open-minded and always polite, they have a strong sense of loyalty because of their ability to put themselves into the shoes of others. Virgo/Libras love to debate but not to quarrel; a fine distinction that is nonetheless very important. They are kind and considerate, and they rarely display anger. Instead, they may employ subtle means of getting even when their strong sense of fairness and legality, or their refined sensitivities, are violated.

They tend to be somewhat health-conscious, which ensures they take good care of themselves and their loved ones. In their leisure time, Virgo/Libras often turn their interest in health into an exercise or fitness program. However, they have a definite lazy streak, preferring to read and go out with friends. Exercise generally appeals to them only if it is effective and allows socializing at the same time. Some have a particular affinity for activities that let them get out in nature, such as hiking and horseback riding.

In love relationships, Virgo/Libras are playful, romantic and devoted. The great strength of the Virgo/Libra-born is in their attention to detail and their desire to be of service. They pick up on the little things that most others miss. Their drive for peace and harmony and their ability to obtain balance and cooperation from a disparate group is unparalleled. Their skill at seeing all sides of a situation makes them one of the most just characters of the zodiac.

Now I'm not saying that it's true but I'm not ruling out the idea that it sort of describes me. I'm not saying that horoscopes completely explain your personality or how you are; but I will say that it's interesting to read something like this and think to yourself, "hey, I do sort of act like that."

I'm not sure, but I like how they describe my sign, it's quite flattering if you ask me. If you think this is how I act, I would say that's pretty awesome. I'm a catch, one of a kind, rare sign. I guess if you want an idea of what I like then you should definitely consider the points made here. Here are some highlights that I most definitely agree with:

• Despite their inherent modesty, those born on the Virgo/Libra cusp are industrious and efficient when working for a good cause [I want to work for a non-profit org for some type of cause]
  
• Virgo/Librans are happiest when they're in a relationship [oh yes I am]
  
• Their drive for peace and harmony and their ability to obtain balance and cooperation from a disparate group is unparalleled [All the world needs is peace, love, and happiness
  

Anyways, I actually enjoyed reading this; I hope you understand me that much more.

Coffee Dates

I remember reading this years ago; I stumbled upon it again and thought about it after going out on a couple of casual dates:

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The
pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes".

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things in life. Your God, your family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions: things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else: the small stuff.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean house and fix the disposal.

Take care of the golf balls first; the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

This story is amazing; I've read it over and over again over the past couple of years and never get tired of it.

If you can't tell from my previous posts, my life has been hectic, crazy, and ridiculously busy. But recently, I've made certain that I leave some time aside or make time to catch up with old friends and relax over a coffee date.

Even when times get rough, even when times are hard, and even when times are limited; there's always time for a small coffee date. I've been catching up with several of my friends despite all my scheduled meetings, gatherings, and study sessions; even for just half an hour in a day. It's been comforting to see familiar faces again.

With my recent lifestyle change, I actually plan to become closer friends with some of them; people that I've found to enjoy spending time with. Some friends are from way back in high school and some are people that I just met; all I know is that I enjoy hanging around with them.

I'll always try my best to make time; especially for these new and old friends of mine. This story reminds me of one of my interview questions for Starbucks:

"What is your favorite thing about coffee?"

My response: "It gives you a reason to go on a date."

Dear Mr. Dentist

All I wanted was my filling filled in because now I can't smile without feeling ugly. I stepped into your office at my exact appointment time which was 9AM and I didn't get seated into the dentist chair until 9:45AM. As I sat there waiting, you told me you'd be right back to check out my teeth... About 45 minutes later sitting on that chair [I fell asleep a couple of times if I may add in] you finally came in to check my teeth.

I said, "Mr. Dentist, all I want is a filling so that I can smile again" while frowning. Unfortunately, all you could say is that I needed to have my teeth cleaned before he can evaluate my filling. So with another addition of $30, I had my teeth cleaned.

I came back to the dentist and said, "Mr. Dentist, all I want is a filling so that I can smile again" while frowning. Unfortunately, all you could say is that I need to have a deep cleaning to get the "deep" tartar out. I did not understand because I thought that my teeth were already white, but I figured if it has to be done, let it be done. Even the receptionist said, "oh wow, you have such white teeth!" I was redirected to the consultation office but I had to wait a long time again. After learning that it would cost $100 more, I refused and went back to the dentist.

So I said again, "Mr. Dentist, all I want is a filling so that I can smile again" while frowning. Unfortunately, all you said was that you recommended that I get lumineers because it would look great on me. I was redirected to the consultation office again after waiting a long time. There I learned that it would have cost thousands of dollars. Besides, why would I want "acrylic nails" on my teeth? So I refused.

So once again I said, "Mr. Denist, all I want is a filling so that I can smile again" while frowning. Unfortunately all you said was that, "I don't have time, please reschedule with my secretary."

So I rescheduled for later on this week for Thursday despite the fact that I have plans on Saturday where I am now going to have an ugly smile.

So I left while frowning, still missing a filling in my teeth from your office which is now 12:00PM. So thus I stayed for 3 hours to get my already clean teeth cleaned.

Dear Mr. Dentist, you are mean. My teeth are still white; you just want the money that I don't have.

I'm still going to smile though despite the missing filling, just thought I'd let you know.

- Your Client: Jared Falcis

Mission Accomplished

I am sorry, this is going to be a very quick post; I just wanted to say to myself, "mission accomplished."

Tonight was my first big event for Barkada as Academics Chair; which was the Kuya/Ate/Ading Chuck E Cheese night. And after all the hard work, it most definitely is a great feeling of achievement knowing that I did a job well done with planning, executing, and pairing up the families.

So many people came up to me tonight saying, "thank you Jared for giving me my Kuya/Ate/Ading."

I know it was a short blog, but I figured that I'd recognize myself for doing an awesome job tonight. Accomplishment to me is absolutely one of the most powerful feelings to experience and enjoy.

Deep Talks

Hopefully I will be able to write a complete and well thought out blog now despite the fact that I am under the influence.

Under the influence of what? Alcohol? Sure... but I am influenced by so much than just alcohol, I am under the influence of beers and deep talks. It was just one of those nights where I just had to sit down with some friends and talk about the problems and issues going on not only in just my life, but about society in general.

The hot topic of the night: Proposition 8. Yes, if you haven't heard now, this proposition has passed. Same-Sex marriage is no longer legalized in California as well as other states in America. If you've done your research, you would know the arguments on both sides and their reasons for voting yes or no.

I think that we just wanted to discuss the LGBT community in general. It most definitely is a struggle, it really is. The hardest part in any gay man's/woman's life is the coming out process and feeling "accepted" among not only loved ones but the society as a whole. The passage of 8 has only made it harder for many individuals to make it through this process or even start it. Speaking from a Filipino family perspective [as I am Filipino], most of the older generation of Filipino's automatically apply the negative connotations of the term "Bakla" to the LGBT community. Most Filipino parents don't necessarily understand what "gay" is compared to "Bakla." I guess it's understandable as they really aren't informed about what the differences are.

But in all seriousness, the "YES" on Prop 8 ads made the queer community feel like they aren't humans, that they aren't "equal" to the rest of society. It disguisted me to find that ads were using children to "protect" the sanctity of marriage. So my only question is, "So, you don't want to teach your kids about the LGBT community? You don't believe that your children should learn about that community?

Well, there will always be a difference of opinion so I shouldn't even really be arguing.

On a lighter not my "hope" for "change" has been enlightened and I am so exicted for this year's elections. Hopefully he can talk to the talk as well.

I'm meeting all my old acquaintanaces again and I'm really happy to hear from some of them. This year has many ups and down coming up. All as I ask that you guys support me for whatever is going to happen. Personally, I feel like the LGBT has been silenced after so much struggle to be heard. It's such a small percentage of the population that the vast majority is already uncomfortable with; so how does everybody get involved and support something that not only doesn't affect them, but also makes them feel uncomfortable? It's something that needs to continue to be fought for; I do believe that one day the LGBT community will be seen as equals rather than a group of individuals that must be treated differenty.

In my personal life, things have been looking up since I've de-pledged. Personal life is picking up, school is catching up, things are getting done, I'm hearing from friends again, and things that I thought I've given up on have given me hope for the future. You made my gloomy day not so gloomy; thank you so much.