Oh vacation. So the saying of the week is DO SOMETHING EVERYDAY. That was our goal this week of vacation. We just wanted to make sure that we dont waste a single day doing nothing.

So I can start on Monday. Monday I had to drop my dad off at the airport so that he could fly to Boston to meet up with my mom and sister. Im sure Boston was a blast; but I got to have the house all to myself for the next couple of days! Haha. I wasnt planning on having any parties of anything of that sort. Its just a cool thought. Anyways, after I dropped off my Dad, I went straight back to Victorville to meet up with Karla, Jaclyn, and Lonnie. We just chilled at Karlas and watched the Hills and some other random shows. As long as I chill with people everyday Im technically doing something.

Tuesday was a similar day as well. I had work until night; so that kind of took up the majority of my day. When I got back to Victorville, I headed off to Nubis down Bear Valley. Its pretty crazy; its a soft serve yogurt place like Yogurtland. I was even surprised that they had mocha. I chilled with Karla, Dez, Sammy, Deej, Rainy Boy, and another guy named Mario. Anyways, it was a real chill time; we seriously just caught up on each others lives. Afterwards, a couple of us went to my house to watch a movie. Jaclyn and Lonnie met up with Me, Karla, and Dez at my house. We decided on watching a movie called ATONEMENT. I wasnt that interested; in fact, I began falling asleep in the movie. The girls liked it though. We didnt finish it because everybody was getting tired. We turned it off like three quarters into the movie. We were just going to finish it the next day.

Later on before I went to bed, I decided to check my grades. I actually did a lot better than I originally thought. I almost got straight As. But unfortunately because I missed several classes in marketing and tennis, I got lower grades. I got B plusses for both classes. So, not bad for an extremely hard quarter.

The next day was the PACN teaser video shooting. I couldnt make it again. I feel bad cause I think they really needed me for the shooting. Its alright, Ill just try to make it up as we start practices. Later on, Karla and I finished watching Atonement. Like I said before, theres really not too much I could say about it for myself. We decided to just chill later after we get some rest. Dez came over and watched Boondoc Saints with us. I will admit thats a good movie. I havent seen it in years but its well balanced in seriousness and comedy.

Thursday night was out last night to chill with all the Victorville people. So I had dinner with my brother, Jaclyn, Karla, and Lonnie. We ate at Red Robin, found the picture that was supposed to be hanging upside down, got beer, and headed back to my place again. We were just watching Americas Best Dance crew and hanging out. It was a good way to end my week of vacation.

ALRIGHT, so the next couple of days would be our camping trip for Jowees birthday. It was A LOT of fun to me. There were a couple of things that we did get in trouble for; primarily the noise complaints. Well theres not that much we can do; Barkada is a loud group in general. Anyways, I took a nap and found that the other family left. They probably got really annoyed of us. Honestly, I cant say too much about camping either. Joy and I were the main suppliers of tents, tarts, chairs, and light. I had a nice personal conversation with Pat. Yeah, I dont have any complaints about this past weekend. I felt bad though because I had no reception so I couldnt make or receive any calls. I know Mark sent me a text but it was already too late for him to stay over after practice.

Before we left San Diego, we ate out. Leo ordered this challenge of a dozen egg omelet. It was a lot of fun edging Leo on and motivating him; but in the end Leo was getting dizzy from all the egg yolks. So after we ate we all just headed back to Jowees to drop of stuff. I got everything I needed and Jowee paid for half a tank of my gas.

Yeah so theres really not a lot I could say about this weekend but still had a great time. I was looking over the classes I need to take by the end of next year. If the class I need is not offered over summer, then Im stuck having to stay another year. Just on one class. Im really scared because I was really counting on graduating on time. Well all I could do is hope for a miracle. Anyways, yes this is a short blog and Im unbelievably TIRED right now so I cant write down everything I need to say. School is about to start this week so Im excited about that too. PACN practices are going to be starting as soon as it can and Sportsfest is this coming weekend. I wont be able to be in charge of anything of Sportsfest this year because of work and school but I will most definitely be around.

I cant say too much on my personal thoughts; I guess Im really tired. It was nice hearing from you. Its been awhile than from what were used to. Thanks; I know well be ok. Sorry to all my readers; this one is a short blog.

Not the most exciting week; but nonetheless I still made good time. Trying to stay productive.

So Monday was a really nice day; I just chilled at home back in Victorville. I finally got to relax over break. It was actually finals week but I finished all my finals early so I pretty much got an extra week off than everybody else. Not the best of quarters, in fact I could probably say it was my worst quarter ever in college. But you know how it is; they say your third year is probably your hardest year. UGH but we shall see how next year turns up.

Alright so my sprained leg situation. Its gotten a lot better. I was able to walk on it after a couple of days. Theres still a really nasty bruise there; really sick. But its going away slowly. It is still somewhat swollen, or maybe my feet are oblong? That would suck… anyways; it does still hurt, probably because I havent been doing much to let it heal. But at least I can now exercise again. So Im not complaining too much. I cant really bend it too far just yet, but as far as walking and running, its still in top shape. Thank goodness. I could finally start training again.

So Tuesday I went to Pomona. I hung out with Christie and I GOT MY EARS PIERCED. Whaaat? Who would have thought right? Well Ive always wanted to get them re-pierced; its just over break I finally got the urge too. So I did. It didnt hurt too much, but it was all fun when Christie totally videotaped me while getting them done. I really wanted to get some black ones; that would have matched the look that Im going for. BUT unfortunately, we had a limited selection and I had to get diamonds. I mean its not bad; but it doesnt really fit my style. My parents dont know yet, in fact they didnt even notice. ROCK ON haha. Anyways, Im going to have to wait about six weeks until I can switch them out. Im probably going to do it earlier though; is that a good idea? Anyways, so I got them done at Clairs at West Covina Mall, then we went to Target, Islands, and back to school. I went to study session for a little bit then decided to head back up to Victorville. I actually got a lot of work done; I finished my project that was due for accounting. Im pretty satisfied with it; I think it turned out great. I felt bad later on that night because Mark needed a place to sleep over but I wasnt home; I think he got to chill at Frois for the night so it was all good. Im worried about my Ading, I hope hes doing well in school.

Anyways, the next day I had to print out my project. I had to get ink and all these other materials for it. I went to office max and got everything I needed. None of the printers back at the house could actually print my stuff so I had to head all the way back to Pomona just to print my project. I had to turn it in the next day anyways so it wasnt too big of a problem. It felt really good finishing my project up early and having the rest of week to relax and chill. Mark ended up calling me up because he stayed the whole night at study sessions for his finals; so I let him take a nap at my apartment after his final. Im a pretty good Kuya if you ask me, I wonder if Im going to get Kuya of the year again? Probably not, nobody really sees what I do; its all good though.

Alright, so Ive come to the conclusion that I really want to graduate by the end of next year. SO I really need to get back on track. Im going to go crazy next year with classes. Im talking about twenty unit quarters and everything. Barkada is probably a no. I wont be around for that at all. Maybe once in awhile, but Ive got to stay away from that. Im thinking of rushing for DSP, the frat that Christie is in. Its actually not that expensive so it shouldnt be a problem. It is a business Frat so its definitely a plus for me. So, next year is going to be crazy; just gotta prep up for it. I need an internship too. And then theres senior project. Oh yes, Im going to be quite busy. I really do need to graduate though.

So my family except for my brother and I are going to Boston. How fun. Too bad I couldnt go because of work; its alright though. Im going to be spending a lot of time with friends over break so Im excited for that. AND Ill have the house all to myself haha. PARTY. No just kidding. But Im most definitely going to be going out a lot over break. OH so my plans that were supposed to happen on Friday were cancelled; its ok, I was promised wed chill another time. Ivan called me up on Friday to chill, so I did that instead. It was cool catching up, this time he wasnt sick and dying. We just killed some time before the night festivities. I ended up going to Irvine to visit Karla. Partied with a new group of people. They were fun; did some things that I normally wouldnt, but I still had a good time. It was quite the experience. Dont worry, I didnt do anything crazy.

ALRIGHT, so Hollister totally got mad at me about my earrings. Im not surprised. I had to change my availability for next quarter; something tells me Im not going to be getting a lot of hours for awhile. I couldnt take off my earrings because I did just get them in; but Im going to have to take them off as soon as I can. Hollister is really busy now that its Spring Break. Its ridiculous.

So today was really boring. With my Mom and Sister in Boston, my brother in Orange County, and my Dad just getting home from work there wasnt much to do. I was going to go to Corona to hang out with the cousins and the family at a party; but that was cancelled since everybody went to their other familys side. SO I literally just chilled at home all day for Easter. I was hoping for a feast haha. Oh well, Im sure Im going to have better experiences in the future as always. My dad will be going to Boston tomorrow, Im going to have to drop him off at the airport. Spring break has a lot of things planned, camping is just one of them.

So I started a new song. Its called Never Again by Justin Timberlake. Honestly, I get emotional playing it. But thats the amazing thing about music; you should play all the time. When youre happy, sad, mad, or whatever emotion your feeling; you can always express it in music. Then again, you could always do that in any form of art. I choose to do it through music. My skills are getting better since the New Year. Im feeling really proud of myself. Anyways, yes, so that was my week. But there are a couple of things Im going to reflect on…

Anyways, so my process is progressing. I learned a lot this week and experienced a lot. I learned something about my family; in fact I learned that they even discussed it for a short time. I didnt learn that much but it really scares me. I almost took a giant step forward and I was ready to do so. But since plans were cancelled maybe God was telling me not yet. Me and Karla had a deep conversation about everything and our lives. I realize that I do deserve better. I am being the bigger man about it; Ill always be there for her even though she wont try her best to be there for me. She told me she doesnt do the best friend thing with people shes dated; its totally understandable. I guess Im putting that thing behind; I wouldnt want that to bring me down and my relationship with her. I just want to be really good friends to say the very least. Its great to know we are. Maybe she doesnt see me the way I see her, but at least I know that Im important in her life. All I can do is support her and be happy for her; which I am. I never want to hurt her again; and she feels the exact way towards me. I do love her, not like in love love; more like family. Anyways, Ill always be there for her; with the familiar saying [no matter what]. I really do hope that her next one is better than me; just as long as she doesnt regret us. OH Im not talking about Karla by the way haha. Anyways, Im progressing more and more with my process. Oh good luck to me… the way I was living before didnt work, so I should just take a risk and try something new. But its great to know Ill have certain friends to fall back on. Thanks.

By the way readers [if I have any], if youre wondering what Im talking about and were good friends; talk to me. Well grab dinner and Ill tell you my story.

Were acting ridiculous; we need to stop. But never forget what we had, and never forget Ill be there for you [not matter what]. I do love you [so much]. Not like before; but you are most definitely one of the most important people in my life…

Another week, another week. This week wasnt that exciting; except it was the last week of school.

To start off the week, I got a haircut. I wasnt lying when I said last week that I was planning to get a trim. WELL, I told the lady that I was planning to grow my hair out and I even showed her a picture of how I wanted it to be sort of like in the end. She saw and gave the advice to just texturize your hair instead of cutting it. She said that it would take away the poofy look on me and allow me to do stuff with it. So I decided to give it a try and see how it works. I told her that I dont like my back long so she cut it for me. IN THE END, I do like my hair. Its looking pretty good, I just got a lot of growing to go through still. I could do stuff with it like style it and people are noticing that its looking cool. Good plan good plan.

I sprained my ankle on Tuesday. UGH. Ive never had to go to anything for a sprained angle, broken leg, or whatever. I wasnt even going to go to the health center but when people in the API started noticing that it was swelling up I decided to walk there with Ian to get it checked up. No X-rays were needed; the doctor just wrapped it up and told me to do some exercises. I neglected to do them the whole week though. It was cool though because I feel completely healed after a couple of days; I could even walk on it now. BUT the second day it was hurting like CRAZY. I asked my parents to get me crutches but when they finally came in, I didnt need them anymore. GO figure! So yeah, I guess theres a first time for everything. Its still a little swollen and theres a huge bruise on it; it looks really gross. Im sure it will go away soon.

Mark came over a couple of times this week; mostly because of the late night practices. I dont mind; after all he is my ading. Anyways, its always cool chilling with him cause like I said before both of us are getting more and more busy. After all he has b.MOD and, well, Im going through a lot of changes…

This week was the last week of PACN practices until the new quarter starts. So if Im right it was our second and third practice. Its actually looking really good; I think I have to be stricter next quarter. Unfortunately, we dont have that much time left before PACN comes after we come back. I still have acting practice to do as well; and thats not even including sportsfest! OH its going to be a crazy spring quarter once again… But my practices are going to become more strict for sure, we have to keep going and going; stay on track.

OH so its finals week now; lucky for me I finished early. I just wanted to get this quarter finished already. It most definitely was not one of my best quarters; in fact I could honestly say that it was probably one of my worst quarters. My final for IBM ended up being a B but I needed and A in order to get an A in the class. Boo. My accounting cumulative final was just horrible. I dont even want to go into detail; lets just hope for a curve! Didnt get the A I wanted in IBM and ACC is just horrible. Tennis class Im probably going to get a B and my lab class the same thing. I still have one more project to finish by next Friday but its already looking good. We already have all the necessary things we need to finish. Im just waiting for the rest of my group to turn in their parts of the project.

So to just say some things off topic, Im thinking of piercing my ears over break. Seriously. Ive always thought about it but never actually got the urge to just go out and do it. I have the urge now; like I said, changes. I think itll look cool. Who knows, I dont want anything crazy but if I dont like it I could just close it back up right? Not plugs; ouch thats permanent and looks like it hurts. Both ears though. AND I dont want diamonds; Im aiming for more of that punker look. Im so not a punker though haha. Another thing off topic are my resolutions. I think my sprained ankle totally screwed me over this week. I only worked out twice this week and I havent been able to practice piano too much. UGH. I hope its not going to slow me down. I found out when I went to the health center that I lost fifteen pounds since the new year. Im really proud of myself… gotta keep shedding those pounds though. OH I want to start my new sheet music soon; Im just about finished with BECAUSE OF YOU. So the new one I want to start is Until the End of Time by Justin Timberlake. It sounds awesome on the piano. Anyways, Im probably not going to start it for another couple of weeks… well see how that goes.

So Ive always liked the idea of coming back different. What do I mean by that? Well for vacations and MIA times, I like coming back different then how I left. So when people see me again theyll be all like WOW you look different. Or WOW youve changed. But always for better. Thats why I want to get pierced ears and go through some training over break. So that when I come back Ill look somewhat different then how I looked when I left. Hopefully that goes well.

I chilled at Calebs last night. A LOT of fun. I finally got to play Brawl. Crazy game. Im actually challenged by it since Im not that good at it. I really want to play again when I have time. Lots of new characters and the controls are crazy. Haha, alright, thats enough with sounding like a gamer when I really dont play games that often.

So I missed a couple of things here in Victorville. Apparently it snowed here yesterday. UGH I missed it; it always snows like once a year here. Ah well, the rest of the family didnt get to see it either except for my Dad. Anyways for the weeks to come I have a lot of things that Im excited for… Jowees big birthday. Camping up in San Diego! Sounds like a lot of fun; Ill have to let you guys know how it goes later. Jaimies birthday is coming up too, she has plenty of plans over break. And another big thing for me is possibly this Friday… whats happening? Youll find out… maybe. Im nervous, scared, anxious, excited, and every other weird possible emotion. Its going to be awkward at first; but everybody has to go through it sometime. Maybe Ill find something unexpected. First big step of my process. Haha…

Im sorry, I just might end up disappointing you even though you said youd be happy for me… Im scared about that probably the most…

End of my dead weeks. This week was so unbelievably fun and so unbelievably busy.

To start off the week, I finished the Sayaw choreo with Christine. Its really nice, Im really excited for PACN. Ive already got a lot of interest in Sayaw so its looking really good. The music, the choreo, and everything is all ready.

Oh man, what a Monday night. It was Amverlees birthday; in fact, it was her 21st birthday. We all surprised her at BJs after telling her that we couldnt make it. She was all talking crap behind our backs when she thought we werent going haha. She started getting all kawawa when she found out we were able to make it. It really made her happy. Her sister paid for EVERYTHING. It really was a good birthday. The party later moved to a hotel. Little did we know Abby got Amverlee a MALE STRIPPER. Haha. How funny. I would have loved to see the reaction on her face but all the guys were kicked out. I didnt really mind, but I wish I could have seen her reaction. From what I hear, it kind of died after the first twenty minutes because they already had their fun; you know, they arent seriously getting into the whole entire stripping ordeal. Pretty much it was for laughs rather than for pleasure lol. Well since the guys got kicked out for an hour, we ended up just going to a seven eleven and buying beers. Security guard caught us in the car; it was quite funny. We seriously told him the truth about everything that we were waiting for the girls because the stripper kicked us out. The security just gave us a weird look and said ok. Haha. Anyways, all in all, it was a GREAT night. I had a lot of fun because I got to chill with people who I havent seen in a long time like Mike and Liz.

So then Tuesday soon came. A really bad day for me. I had one of those mental break downs that come out of nowhere because of things that happened in the past. Well, it wasnt necessarily about things that happened in the past, but more like I saw some other person getting the attention that I used to get. Its more of a feeling of thinking I miss that. Anyways, it didnt last very long. Thank goodness. Later on in the night it was PACN practice. Our first one this year. I learned about my character; Im really interested in my role actually. I have a role in PACN that deals with a somewhat small issue in Filipino Culture. Thus, Im not a major role, but my role does deal with issues. Basically Im a masculine closeted gay in the PACN. Haha. Its going to be interesting. I like the script so far, I havent read the second half yet but I know whats supposed to happen. Basically I get beat up and I befriend other homosexuals in the play. I think I come out. Im not too sure, but in the end Im going to have a fun time with the PACN.

Wednesday was the first day for practices for Sayaw. I started teaching the first two or three eight counts. So far its looking good, I have the benches in the back of my car. There werent that many people this week of course because it was the first week of PACN. Im sure that there are going to be much more people next quarter. Ive decided that I also want to do the members modern piece in PACN. Mark, Kim, and David are all coordinating it. Should be fun. I had to cut practice short in Sayaw because there was another volleyball game. We all thought that volleyball was over but apparently there was one more. In the end we lost, but I will say that the last game was well played. After the game we went to mix bowl and ate. There are a lot of people doing the whole entire pool bet where theyre trying to lose weight. I gave them that idea haha. Apparently their pool is bigger than mine was in high school. Anyways, I think only a couple of them are seriously involved in the pool. I wonder whos going to win…

Thursday I decided to go the Barkada meeting. Afterwards a couple of us decided to eat Subway. Nothing much happened Thursday but later on in the night I had a kick back at my apartment. Just a couple of beers. They ate a lot of my hot pockets but it was all good. I dont usually eat those unless Im in a rush so I didnt have a problem. Im still keeping up with staying in shape so Im not slacking off in that.

Friday came. I got a lot of hair products because Im getting really tired of my hair. Im so ready to have it all cut off. But Im going to keep growing out because Ive already come so far. Honestly though, Im probably going to cut it short in Easter if I dont like it. Friday night was E-board auction. CRAZY stuff. Nikki and I were the emcees for the night. We did a really good job. The person who got sold the most was Johanna for six hundred. Nice stuff. Dollar dares were cool. After e-board auction I decided to go to Julians for his twenty first birthday. It was a nice chill party and I saw faces that I havent seen in a long time as well. I saw Betty-Jo and Iris. It was cool chilling with them. Ana came later on in the night as well. Food was really good and Julian got messed up. Party ended early like around one thirty ish. Julian was out before that. Anyways, I had a really good chill time that night.

I havent gotten the chance to hang out with JoJo this week because she had her hell week for 909. Its all good, hopefully well be able to chill this week. I had class on Saturday for a practice midterm. But when I came, there were only five people there. Leah and I left early. I thought we were going to start a practice midterm but we were just going over the take home midterm. So we decided to leave early. I had to hurry back to the apartment because I might have had to work that day. They didnt need me so I decided to use my time and figure out how to do my hair. I still dont get it. Im probably going to get a haircut tomorrow. Just a fix up because its looking really poofy. I went back to Victorville that night and had dinner with the family.

Let me tell you something about Saturday night. It was Graces birthday. I havent gotten to hang out with her in a long time. I had to use my brothers ID so I could get into the club we were going to in Victorville. I made it in but the guy looked at me all crazy. I pre partied and partied some more at the club. I was hanging out with Grace when I could but she was everywhere. The majority of the time I hung out with Jay, Justing, Jaypeg, and Dee. Theyre a lot of fun. I had a good time and I got some really good advice from them. Who would have thought huh? Im an open book when I drink. I saw Sammy, Deej, Grace, Dez, Linette, Jorell, Amy, and many other people from Victorville who I havent seen in awhile. I saw Jac, Lynne, Melissa, and met so many new people. Plenty of pictures are up. I left the club with the people in Jays car. We just chilled at Graces until everybody else got there. We totally lost track of time and we all didnt knock out until around five ish. The spring forward time thing totally messed all of us up. I played rock band also. Lets just say that after using my brother ID and partying like I was twenty one, I cant wait until I am.

Sunday morning [today] came around. Everybody didnt get up until around one ish. I helped clean up the house because it was a mess. Anyways, we went to go eat at IHOP for brunch. We had some really bad service. We got seated late, orders came in late, they forgot it was Graces birthday, the orders were wrong. Just so many things messed up. Ah well, it was fun just hanging out with them. We had to get separate tables though, so it was kind of hard to talk to everybody. So we all left after we ate. I hope that I could chill with all of them again. Grace and everybody are just so much fun. They sure know how to have a good time when they do have it. I wasnt supposed to log into myspace, but I had to today because I had to send a message to Jay and them thanking for all the help since I dont have their numebrs. I also had to let Grace know that my pictures were up. Yeah. SO Graces birthday was a blast. I feel bad because I was supposed to chill with Caleb today and play smash brother brawl. I didnt have time though and I was really tired. I had a family dinner and he had to go to Riverside anyways so its all good. Hopefully later on this week Ill have time to play it.

YES. So I LOVED this week.

Hey. Well get through this. Ill get through this. Am I able to do it? Im scared for the repercussions. Youll be there for me right? I know you will. I was sad earlier this week, but Im feeling better. Am I doing the right thing? I think so. Im having such an easier time telling people now. And Im very happy and glad telling certain people. I hope youll be happy for me...

It seemed like another dead week. I didnt really do that much.

Earlier this week I helped Leah finish the lab homework for accounting. Also later on that night I decided to drop by the Sportsfest meeting for a little bit. I planned on studying with Jaimie but it was already getting too late for me; its all good though. Ill just find another time to study with Jaimie.

I was feeling really burnt out this week so I decided to just chill at the apartment for almost the whole day. After class on Tuesday I just headed back to the apartment, worked out, and just chilled there. I cleaned up the whole apartment though. One thing that I am glad about is that it is pretty noticeable to other people that Im losing weight. Its really cool actually. People who I havent seen come up to me and are all like DENG Jared have you been working out? I dont even notice the difference haha. I guess its pretty apparent to other people though; that makes me feel very accomplished.

I got a gift from Dom this week; a twenty five dollar visa gift card. Not bad not bad at all. I feel bad cause I didnt get him anything for Christmas. Next time, Ill get him lunch or something.

My hair is getting SO LONG. Its unbelievable. Well its not extremely long, but its so much longer than what Im used to. Im so tempted to cut it right now, but I think that I should stick it out for a little bit longer. Maybe a couple of weeks before PACN, if I dont like it, Ill cut it.

Yes so as you should know, Ive decided to coordinate Sayaw Sa Bangko with Christine. Its looking really good so far, there are a lot of people who are interested in it. Im actually really excited for it, especially since practices start this week. I worked on a complete choreo, I just need to edit it with Christine and we should be all good with everything.

One thing that I just realized is that I talk really loud on the phone. Actually Ive known it for awhile, but it didnt really hit me until now. Just a random thought.

I went to the general meeting on Thursday. It was fun. I was asked to MC for e-board auction on Friday. Im doing it with Nikki. Its going to be really cool, another thing that Im excited for. Anyways, after the meeting I went to eat out with Christie. That was cool since we havent hung out in a couple of weeks as well. Just caught up on things, vented out about some things, and just had a general good time. Later on that night I decided to go clubbing with Jaimie and a few other people. It was a really chill clubbing night. Nothing much happened.

Friday I hung out with Mark. Got lunch and chilled at the apartment. We dont hang out as often as we used to, so when we do hang out it really does make me feel better. I had to talk to him about some issues that I was going on with me; he gave good advice.

This was a dead weekend, I didnt do much but hang out at the house. Pretty much a dead week in general, but its those small things that make me happy.

At least Im trying hard now... it should be apparent. Its great that you and I are still happy.