Alright, sorry for posting the blog late, I was just really tired from last night that I wanted to knock out. SO a lot has happened this week to a certain extent.

One of the good things to know is that I am still working out and still keeping in shape. So out of all my resolutions I feel that Ive been working on that one the most. Hollister has been bugging me a lot these past couple of weeks. First off I hardly get any hours. For real. From the past three weeks Id have to say that Ive worked like twelve hours. Those twelve hours are only my assigned shifts. I have call ins on many other days but they never need me. Im just about ready to quit. During this week my managers got really mad at me because I wasnt following the Hollister look policy. I mean it was true that I wasnt, but it sort of gave me the kick that I dont even wear Hollister clothes or even try to look like it. Honestly, Im just about sure that Im going to be quitting sometime the next couple of weeks.

Something to look forward to is Calebs birthday in Vegas. I was so stoked to go and I was just about one hundred percent sure that I could go. I even said that I could, but our PACN hell weeks start so I really need to be there. PACN is really kicking me hard.

Studying has been ok. When the quarter first started I got far ahead. I kept on reading ahead and doing assignments early, but now everything is catching up to me. Im no longer ahead, Im on track. But soon I may be falling behind which isnt good. I really need to stay focused on classes because I want to graduate next year. Im even in the API studying while everybody is having a good time. Speaking of PACN practices, things are going very well. My Sayaw crew are doing relatively well and we should be finishing up within the next couple of weeks which means cleaning, cleaning, and more cleaning before the PACN.

Mark also came over again sometime this week. Im not too sure when, but he was tired from b.MOD hell week. Not surprised, theyre out until around three AM just practicing every day. Basically they were getting ready for FUSION that I really wanted to go to this year. I couldnt go because we were celebrating my Moms birthday that day. So it was Mikes and my Moms birthday this week. They both have the same birthday but we celebrated Mikes on Friday and my Moms on Sunday. It was cool; Mike had a good amount of drinks to hold a good buzz at TGIF. I chilled at his apartment with Liz, Jac, and Lonnie.

Ive started to promote PACN to all my friends. Im hoping to sell at least thirty tickets. Sounds like a lot, but actually its not even a lot compared to other people. But hey, Im hoping I have a good turnout especially with my scene. Im really excited for my scenes; I helped Vinz develop my Kawawa scene. Haha its going to be crazy; I dunno if I could cry on the spot.

I have an interesting story. So I thought that my earrings had already healed because they dont hurt at all and I could rotate them and everything without a problem. Because of that, I thought that I could buy myself some fake plugs and put them in. When I tried taking out my earrings, they started BLEEDING. OH MAN. I freaked out, cleaned it up, and put them back in. I guess I really do have to wait six weeks for them to heal. That should mean about two or three more weeks before I could change them and take them off.

Later on in the week, I went to go visit E-board at Rodneys house while they built benches. Its looking really good, Im glad that the benches are finally coming together. Now Im really excited! Anyways, we played brawl and unbelievably I BEAT ALL OF THEM. I dont own a gamecube or a Wii yet I still got them. Haha. Well, in the end it was all fun.

There was a PACN actors meeting this weekend before Riversides PACN. The actor meeting was chill; we went through the script and got a really good idea of whats in store for the second half. Its going to be so sad. But its a really well developed script that Im going to enjoy. After everybody went to Riversides PACN but I couldnt go. I went back to Victorville to chill with family. Later on that night after I watched I am Legend with the family, I went to Karlas house because she was cooking. Though I was full, she wanted me to eat what she had made. It was really good; but we just wanted to catch up with each other. Shes enjoying everything right now.

So my Moms birthday was a lot of fun. We just walked around a couple of malls even though it was BLAZING hot. Just shopped around a little until it was dinner. OH, we found a new apartment. Its a little farther, but things are looking good. We should be moving by the end of May. Its in Rancho. Ive been really thinking about it, and Ive wanted a haircut. At the same time Im afraid that its not going to turn out how I want it to be. SO Ive decided to keep growing it until after PACN and decided what to do from there. Hopefully Ill have an idea by then. I need a new job, Im going to be job searching probably after PACN.

So crazy week. This coming week is going to be just as crazy if Im right... we shall see what happens.

Humility or humiliated? Both? I dunno, too many one last times… way too many. I feel dirty about this guilty pleasure. Itll be the same even if I get off this addiction right? Hopefully… too many one last times… let go. Just. Let. Go.